Saturday, May 29, 2010

letter's to shelbypaige.

little girl,
today my heart is so heavy. i found the slideshow that i made for your funeral and i can't stop crying.
then i realized that today marks thirty days till the two year mark since you took your place in heaven-too soon, too young, too sweet.
then for your dad to follow so closely behind you...
there isn't a moment that goes by that your not in my heart. forever baby girl.
keep watching over your mommy, i feel like she needs it more than ever as she begins to face everything now.
i still look for you in the stars and beautiful sunsets. till we meet again and i can kiss those chubby wonderfully yummy cheeks again.
we love you!
-m, z, and r

(more letters to shelbypaige)

a girl and her hats.

ok, so seriously this was my first try at using the 'a' setting on my nikon d40x. i am not even kidding when i say that i shot most all all on auto (and so far it hasn't really let me down) but i have decided it is finally time to break out of my scarredy cat shell and learn somethings about my camera and lens. i would LOVE to learn how to do a bokeh, yummy sun flares, and get that perfect blurred background-but i think it is going to take some getting used to all the settings. plus, i am told my lens isn't ideal for what i want (18-135mm) so i need to start saving my pennies to get a 50mm and then maybe the nikon d90 (i can dream big can't i?). but for now, i have 3 books on my camera and digi photography on hold at the library and dammit i will become a closet professional yet!
so bare with my blurry grainy photos, even though i think that add a little something something to them (and it really is all in the eye of the beholder).
so, in total mamarazzi mode i realized that stella is already out growing ALL of her awesome hats or it is just a fashion no no for her to still wear some of the winter beanies so me and rowan put on some of our favs to document her collection (still not all pictured, stella got antsy and was done with the musical hats).
i am not a hundred precent sure which texture it was that i used, but i just found the amazing motherload on textures-used here and actions-not this one, over at 

Friday, May 28, 2010

the paper mama photo challenge:three.

is it already another week (a day early) of awesome photo challenges over at papermama?
so hard again this week. so many three's to choose from-three wonderful daughters, tim plus me plus stella equals three, and more...
but i thought, 'that's the easy choice' then i stumbled onto this oldie.
'what's a three letter word for wonderful? Z-O-E.'
i snapped this while on our last family trip to the oregon coast. it is a family favorite and we try to travel there once a year. here we are at seaside beach, where we stay at a wonderful timeshare hotel and the end of the promenade. zoe is so fun to photograph she is always doing something silly! (poor girl fell on her face the first day there and spent the remainder of the trip with a fat beak like lip)
The Paper Mama

here is another fun shot from that day at the beach:
'my perfect little mermaid ♥'

fix it friday at i heart faces.

this was my first try at fix-it-friday. there are so many things i wish were still diff on this photo-like the twins being 'sharper' but i just wanted to play around with a new action set and this was the outcome. lol, i don't claim to be any sort of photoshop genius but i still know enough to have a little fun.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

made my day.

a few posts back i told you about and shared with you a little conversation that my friend jonathan and i had about her.
well, i had emailed said conversation to katie sokoler, thinking she might get a kick out of it if it didn't get lost among the thousands of emails that she gets everyday.
well, to my surprise i opened my email today to this:

Re: just how much you inspire us...
Katie Sokoler   
View Contact
To:Melissa Devine 

haha you two are so funny! Thanks for sharing that convo with me. Totally made me laugh =)

two month well-child check.

we survived, well maybe stella did. i think i am still traumatized from the shots.
poor thing even knew they were coming-the minute the nurse walked in with the plate with them on it stella got all bright red and started screaming...poor thing has ptsd!

so, stella:
weight: 12lbs. and 14.5 oz (i won the bet with a guess of 13lbs.) putting her in the 90-95th percentile.
length: 23.5 inches. putting her in the 90th percentile.
head size 15.74 inches in the 75th percentile. 

i guess she is turning her head to the left too much and it is a little different on that side, so we have to encourage her to turn to the right.
sometime s i think our pediatrician is a little over zealous with her diagnosis. i never heard any complaint about my other two and i'm sure this is something that is fairly common.
oh well, i guess well listen anyway.

*and i reminded our pediatrician once again that we would like to stagger her immunizations to avoid more than two at a time, and she informed me that they have taken to that schedule recently anyway due to all the parents requesting it and all the new findings with immunizations. this makes me one happy mama.


here is my stance on the whole thing if your wondering...
first off, let me say that i wish google didn't exist. (ok, i do but i think i would be a lot less crazier of a mom if it didn't)
with my first baby i was young and naive (thank god) so as i raised her i didn't really let any little fears get in the way of anything, let's say i was way more easy going.
baby number two i bought more books and researched a lot more, and in a word 'freaked' about a lot of stuff that sometimes debilitated me.
enter baby three, oh man. there is just too much information of there today about the pros and cons of everything. it sucks but i makes me question a lot of things i did before and makes me scared for my children sometimes.
for the most part i feel like i know what i am doing three times around but it is even hard to keep up with the change in ideas six years later. i could write a hundred posts on the things i am doing differently and why but today we have to go to stella's two month check up and she should be getting three shots-so i wanted to share our choices and thoughts.
we're not crazy, we know it is important to immunize our children. you can't start thinking, 'well if everyone else does it then why do i have to?' it's that kind of thinking that will lead to the comeback of these serious diseases that they protect our littles against.
twenty years ago we only received about 20 immunization today our kids receive more like fifty-can you believe that?
we have just decided to stagger her shot so that she is not receiving more that two at a time giving her little body and immune system time to take in those before adding more. we're ok with the fact that this means more doctor visits.
i know it would seem better to get them all over with at once, but the issue is more on  the mercury content and what it is proving to do than the little pricks each time.
at this point i am also still up in the air on the chickenpox vaccine. i mean you and i didn't have that when we were kids and we all survived. (i know there can be complications, however rare) if it is one that i can choose to not do, and feel like she will still be healthy then i just might.
so, that's that. i know that was kind of all over the place...all this info on the mercury in shots just really had my wheels turning and brought us to make some decisions on stella's immunizations and i wanted to share.


there is nothing more precious then my two little ladies and the love they have for each other. even on days when they couldn't be more 'sisters' in the bickery naggy kind of way...they still make time to snuggle, play and be friends.
(check out more.)

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

raw(e) photo challenge: tattoos.

wow, totally found this awesome photo link up via papermama over at
your photo entry has to be UNTOUCHED. since i love tattoos, mine especially. i had to join!
this is my cupcake tattoo that lindsay got me for my twenty-fourth birthday. best birthday ever. (she took the photos too, while i cringed under the needle for a couple of hours)

(check out more there)

jillian michaels 30 day shred: day seven.

level two again.

i just worked out so hard, i might barf.

wordless wednesday.

(i have to use words real quick) zoe and her uncle nick, who died of suicide almost two years ago.
check out more wordless wednesdays at 5 minutes for mom.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

jillian michaels 30 day shred: day six.

i moved up to level two today, it is pretty intense. i got a lot more heated and my heart pumped a little faster-and i'll admit some of the moves i couldn't do the full 30 seconds. ouch.

i feel like a failure though, cause right after i drank an entire pitcher of homemade orange julius.

in a yellow house photo challenge: your town.

whew, this is a hard one. seattle, wa has so much to much history, future, art, fun, and pretty much anything imaginable.
ok, so my most favorite thing that my town has to offer is actually about two and a half hours away but when i saw nine inch nails there they said, 'how you doin' seattle? (or something the same)' so it counts, haha.
the gorge, in vantage/george, wa:
i mean seriously, who else can say they have seen tool (the band) just after sunset have a whole crowd quite in their awe while they hold lighters and cell phones illuminating all the hills in the amphitheater and the gorge?! or fried their butts off during the day and froze their toes off at night catching the last band of a festival?!
this place is magical.
i saw my first real concert ever there-matchbox 20 and train. i got caught for the first time drinking under age there. i've camped at the gorge grass lawn and gettys cove down the street. i've made some of my most memorable times there.
we make it a point to try and go to at least one concert there a year...this year, jack johnson!

my entry for the challenge, it doesn't get better than that...
these are from sasquatch last year, we saw nin, jane's addiction, king of leon, the yeah yeah yeahs, and so much more. it was one of my most fun concerts ever.

i am guilty of.

1. calling or texting my boyfriend from bed, when he is in the living room to bring me something (most likely pointless).
2. using all the hot water on little ole' me.
3. calling on nick jr. to babysit when this mom just needs a second.
4. watching the hills.
5. adding to the dyer till it is overflowing because i don't want to have to fold laundry.

so what are your deep dark guilties? i bet if you say them out'll find, lots of other people are maybe just a little nuts like you.

name your top five in a comment or on your blog and link back so we can all see ;)

Monday, May 24, 2010

button up.

sheesh...i leave the blog world for a year or so, and i totally miss the start of all this button fun! so a day late and maybe a dollar short (what does that even mean?) here is my blog's badge.
i hope you grab one and continue to follow along. i have a lot of nonsense to tell you and super cute photos to show you, i promise it'll be a good time!

<a href=""><img src=" width="127" height="127" /></a>

aunts and uncles.

today we headed up to my (only) aunt (linda's) house today for her bday slash my unlces going away slash his birthday get together. it was tons of fun, especially since it is finally dirt bike and trampoline weather out.
our day in photos...
getting ready to ride.
tim and jacob.
rowan wanted a quick ride.
holy static hair batman.
this was rowan's first time on a trampoline. she more pranced than jumped.
everyone needs a crazy jump shot in their self portrait arsenal.
maybe even two.
tim too.
could you resist taking photos of those big blue baby eyes?!
my nephew topher.

i heart faces challenge week twenty-one: yellow.

'my zoe'
yellow, is the perfect color to describe this little girls personality-yummy, warm, bright, and fun
i know we've seen this photo before on the blog but i couldn't think of any better one for this challenge. this was taken on our last trip to deception pass where the girls top priority is throwing large rocks into the water. i had just discovered photshop actions when i got to these photos so i had a little fun with it. enjoy.


Sunday, May 23, 2010

read a regular basis. do it.

and, maybe it'll prompt a conversation like this:
(i have to share me and jonathan's conversations, because they are always this great...i think.)
now, go follow color me katie.

Clear Chat History
have i told you ive been obsessed with colormekatie because of you?
lol, everyone keeps saying that...isn't she the funest thing since sliced bread?! we're always trying out her fun ideas :)
thought bubbles are my fav.
shes just so friggin clever!
i know! she must be the happiest person alive...all she ever does is stuff she loves and has fun!
right. if she has kids they are going to have the best school projects EVER
um, hello...i want to be her child...or lover...or just some art hanging on her wall?!
i loved the pacman thing!
seriously. have you watched any of their improve now vids? they are AWESOME
yeah. damnit i want to be that cool!
let's move to new york and be that cool, k?
like maybe when my kids are in college and i have more free time
its a plan

Saturday, May 22, 2010

jillian michaels 30 day shred: day five.

i skipped today.

so sue me.

the paper mama photo challenge: fingerprint.

sweet, my favorite time of the week...another fabulous papermama photo challenge. i just love her themes!
this week is 'fingerprint' i am a little sad, because when i saw this theme i instantly thought of exactly what photo i wanted to use-and then remembered it had been one of the many lost when our hard drive crashed. i can't stress enough (to prob no one since i was the last one to realize) how important it is to back up you photos.  i have them on two sets of dvd's and on our external hard drive and soon another set in a firesafe safe.
the photo i was thinking of is one of my oldest daughters hand held open in the palm of my mom's when zoe was just an itty bitty. it is an awesome photo-luckily i have it scrapbooked.
so, next in line was this little beauty.

'we call these little toes, bug toes'

tim's cousin had recently reminded me when i am taking photos of the babe to make sure and document all her little parts-because soon they won't be so little anymore!
The Paper Mama

two months.

guess who is two months old today? go ahead guess!
stella is, i can't believe it. sometime i fell like, 'if i only i could go back and hold on to every moment just a tiny bit longer' cause it all goes by too quickly.
she is full on smiling and cooing-her fav person to smile at is daddy and at night on her floor mat is her fav chatty time. she LOVES it when you hang her little elephant blanket so it is peeking at her from the top...she will squeal at him for awhile.
(knock on wood) stella is sleeping through the night. every once and awhile she will go from 9-3 eat and go right back down, but that is even great. a lot of the time too it depends on how her night time schedule went and last time she ate.
she is all the way sleeping in her moses basket, but still loves to be all swaddled up and snuggly.
i am so sad to report that i find more and more little lost stella hairs in her swing and moses basket every day.
i wonder if her hair will be curly...
she is still what i would say is a dream baby, she can be feisty and only want to be held from time to time but is so go with the flow for the most part.

i won't have any stats till the 27th, but i will make sure and repost with that info. i am very curious to see what she weighs since she is still so petite.
could she be any cuter?! the answer is no.


i am at lame 'i got a divorce, so now they think i need a parenting class' class. on the brighter side, i am one step closer to closing that chapter of my life and moving forward with this new one filled with love and laughter.
so i leave you with...