yesterday i noticed stella in her super girl cape bouncing on the couch, ready to spring into the air. usually i would stop her, ask her to sit down and remind her that we don't jump on the couch - but not that morning, i just smiled at her and helped her count down...1...2...3
because she is three and life is too short.
i can't think of a single word or action right now that would do the tragedy in connecticut justice, that could start to fill any hole that is now left in the hearts of that town. also, i don't want to this to be another post that just gets lost among all the others of its kind, so instead i am writing it down as a reminder to myself.
when your world is in such dismay that young adults are fleeing to a massacre as their only option and we are left helpless and left scratching our heads, desperately searching for a why, the best you can do is find lessons in tragedy.
last night when the president addressed sandy hook, it was like he was speaking straight from my heart. when he used the words to describe how having a child is like having your heart out of your body walking around, how they are the most vital part of you. truer words have never been spoken.
this tragedy has taken a toll on everyone emotionally, our entire nation affected, feeling the loss along side that little town, with the parents of those tiny people. as a parent myself, i think we feel it a tiny bit more - i can't speak for everyone, but as soon as the news started unfolding i began panicking about my children who were at school, because you want to know the truth? that could have just as easily been their school. mental illness and troubled people and unpredictable people are everywhere.
so, here is where i am at today - i am once again reminded that it is a huge part of my job as a parent, to make sure that if life were cut short for my tiny people, that it would have been the best life. i have always stood on the camp life is short anyway, so it is perfectly ok to be silly and eat ice cream before dinner and skip school to have a date with your kids and make messes to just live life to the absolute fullest that you can provide. but we get busy and life gets messy and kids are naughty and it is easy to lose sight of this bigger picture.
we have chosen to not talk to the kids about what happened - we can hardly wrap our heads around it ourselves so i can't possibly expect them too. rowan goes to kindergarten next year and she doesn't deserve to have to worry that this might be something to expect when you are that age and at school.
so, in the wake of all of this we are being extra silly with the girls and loving them extra hard. we are accepting extra book requests at night and using whole bottles of bubbles at bath time. we are making huge messes to create crafty master pieces and letting a bag of marshmallows slide as a healthy snack. i am doing my job as a parent to ensure, that if my tiny people should leave this earth suddenly, to go home to the hands of their God, that it would have been the best life.